***Calling all moms***
I've been having an internal battle for some time now in reference to whether I want to have kids or not.
*Disclaimer: Mr. E is fully supportive on whatever decision I make and I fully understand that it will be a mutual decision.
BLUF (bottom line up front)
I know having kids is very hard, I know firsthand the sacrifices that go into raising a child (from my mom), the sleepless nights, the lack of freedom to go about without having to schedule babysitters, the financial strain, the activities they will have to be chauffeured to, the homework and school projects headache, etc. etc.
I am aware of all the hardships that entail having kids. Moms, I need your honest opinion, what are the pros? What makes you appreciate all the hardships of having them, what makes it all worth it? If you have to leave an anonymous comment in order to be brutally honest please go ahead and do so. On the other hand, what do you miss about being childless, do you regret having kids? Seriously, I would like to know both sides, most people talk about the bad but I don't hear too much about the good so here's your chance. THANK YOU!!!
6 comments:
As I type this to you, I can barely do so as I have a 30# two-year old boy laying across me; seeing as simply sitting next to his mama wasn't close enough for him.
I am also typing this slightly exhausted. My son woke up 5 times last night between 8pm and 5:30am due to razor sharp 2-year molars plaguing his poor little mouth.
Yesterday, he pooped on the potty for the first time. For the babysitter, not me.
When he was tiny, he wanted to be worn all the time, nurse all the time,be rocked all the time. As he's grown we've lost our freedom to just take off at a moment's notice.
But you know what? He is worth every trial, tribulation and so much more that I have yet to experience. On days I'm tired, he kisses my forehead, tells me to rest and that he loves me. He draws scribbles and I know they are works of art. He has tiny finger and toes that I made.
He completely our family, just by being born.
We didn't have him for any other reason then one day, we were missing something. Not love, not a pet, not material possessions. Our family just felt incomplete.
It doesn't feel like that anymore.
No matter how horrible everything is, my son giggles, and every trouble melts away.
Read the blog, becoming sarah, (if I could move more I would link for you). She describes EXACTLY what being a parent is all about.
Good luck in your decision and please excuse any typos along the way.
I'm SO glad that you're asking for both sides of the story to children, becuase I think that you're right and too often, just the negatives come out.
Yes, there are lots of negatives to having children...and there are a lot of things that you might miss of your life without kids - back when "things were easy." But there are SO many things that I wouldn't trade for all the money in the world.
There is a bond created between you and your child during your pregnancy, during those first months and the next years. There's the joy of hearing "I love you" for the first time...the sweet sight of your toddler "walking" towards you with arms outstretched...the way they butcher words of the English language in such a cute way...and the sadness when they quit saying that word the wrong way and learn to say it correctly. There's such joy walking down the street with that small hand in yours, the knowledge that you are a hero in their eyes...no matter how many times they ask you if you're having another baby when you're not!
There are just too many positives...they FAR outweigh the negatives...each and every day. Even on the days when you want to scream and tear all of your hair out...becuase there will be those days too. But the sight of your child asleep, all curled up in their footed pjs, hugging teddy for dear life...or the way that they smell right after a bath...there's just too many to go on and on.
I hope that helped...
It is not a decision of facts and figures. It is a personal decision of the heart. Children are not for everyone and you don't need them to be complete. But I could not imagine my life without mine. I would say wait until you don't need a poll to tell you (not a judgement) but don't take for granted that you will be able to have them whenever you want to because for many - that is hard to. Good luck!
Ed. by isha - that is hard too. Good luck!
Thank you ladies, it means the world to me that you've shared your beautiful mother experiences...that's exactly what I wanted to hear. My decision to become a parent will be achieved by much more than this post but I appreciate you sharing your side of the story for me to consider.
My oldest is almost 25. My youngest is a set of 10 year old twins.
Is being a mom hard? Heck yeah.
But the joy of watching a child blossom into adulthood and beyond is not available through any other means.
When my oldest, at the age of 17, thanked me for his childhood and told me that he had nothing but good memories....well....I had a lot of not so good memories. But it all faded away in that moment.
I am a single mom of five. I wouldn't change a thing. Not the sacrifice. Not the fear. Not the pain. Every single stinkin' moment has been worth it.
From the birth of my first child, to the launching of my twins, I will be parenting with a child in my home for a total of 36 years.
I'd do every puking, pooping, crying, sleepless moment again....in a heartbeat.
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